Prog Rock & Prog Metal’s 7 Greatest Mythical Albums!

So rare it's as if these mythical albums never even existed....

Posted on April 1, 2016 by Chris Jennings in Features

2. Public Pets – One Finger One Hole

Obscure and ridiculously private, the unusual personalities of Paul, Sven and Larsen Smchelchiovsky created the tribal sound of Public Pets based on the Creole Indian meditation music that reflects colour and sound as one concept. If you’ve ever wondered what ‘bastard-amber’ sounds like, then the work of Public Pets is for you! Incidentally, the album title is alleged to have been suggested by the Grand Magi of Syracuse as being the only way to stop a nose bleed.

Notoriously reclusive, Public Pets only made one live performance, at the Cartoon Club in Croydon, but they refused to allow any members of the public to attend. The gig was recorded on video from behind a curtain and the only surviving copy of the sound track is now in the Syracuse museum of modern art.

The brothers went their separate ways in the early 90’s, tired of the lack of privacy their companionship afforded them, and this album (which is not available) remains one of prog’s greatest mysteries.

1. Rectal Hemorrhage – Reverse Transfusion

How could this list not culminate in this wild and wigged-out album from renowned proggers Rectal Hemorrhage! Reverse Transfusion spent 8 years at the top of the Acme Prog Metal Charts, selling over 780 million copies worldwide in the process, and the track list reads like a greatest hits set; “Stick it up yer Jacksee (but not too far)”, “Rock ‘n’ Roll R Swype” and “Blood On the Seat” to name just a few.

The band, comprising of Jess ‘The Mess’ Dunlop (vocals), Andrex Scupper (keyboards and wet wipes) Mick ‘Mickey’ Muckley (bass), Trevor Douglas Highgrove Smyth (drums) and Poppet ‘The Groupie’ Twiddle (electric tambourine) seriously raised the game with the release of Reverse Transfusion, causing many renowned musicians to consider their futures. In fact, it was rumored that Rick Wakeman was ready to quit the business and return to his first love of Dendrology when he first heard the complexities of this album.

With dramatic advances in medicine impeding their progress, the band decided to call it quits in 2006. Jess ‘The Mess’ Dunlop went on to produce several small bands but never managed to find a similar recipe for success. He now works in McDonalds in Preston.